Can you?

sisteronwheelsblog
May 10
3 min read

During the most recent baptism at my church, one of the young ladies said in her testimony: “Growing up, no one really cared for me, I was usually the last one to be picked- but Jesus chose to die for me.”

Those words left a staple on my heart; because, in all honesty, they reflected a shared sentiment. It’s been a few weeks, and I can still hear her voice as clearly as if it was yesterday.

I believe that during some segments of our timeline; many of us have come against a version of that statement. I know I have- more times than I’d like to admit. As humans, even as servants of Jesus Christ, we often default towards our emotions, sometimes measuring our worth by how special we feel in someone else’s eyes. I’ll be the first one to admit that even when you’ve learned not to let people’s opinions define you, their words can linger a bit longer than you’d like. Ever been there?

It’s not that you don’t know that you are wonderfully and beautifully made, but the silence of a friend/relative during your season of need can echo loudly for days. The silent clap during one of your minor miracles can live rent-free in your mind. The distant looks from loved ones can pierce the heart. Harsh words from half-explained interactions can create drifts. Mixed signals can paint wrongful pictures. And actions born from someone’s fear of being hurt can cause someone else to bleed.

All of which could perhaps be resolved- if both parties choose each other, to the point of dying to self, and laying down their pride.

Many a time in my life, when I wondered: in any closed-knit group- be it friendships, work colleagues, or church family- if survival depended on one person’s sacrifice, would the choice be obvious? Will it ever not be me? That nagging feeling of being temporary and replaceable can lead to wrongfully developed hurt and isolation. The idea that you are good, but never good enough, can force you into a cycle of overproving and self-comparison. The pain attached to a not-so-forever love for those who don’t know how to not give anything less than their all can be debilitating.

Recently, a series of events caused me to revisit those thoughts. I wanted to understand their roots, triggers, and the antidote. It’s never wrong to feel the emotions- the danger lies in making permanent decisions based on those fleeting feelings.

Welcome to 1-800-Chris-Tell (see what I did there?).

Before I could bring my complaints to God about how the issues of the heart, I remembered the Cross. I remembered Jesus. Suddenly my complaints seemed benign. He left the Heavens and came down to the earth He created to live there under the constraints of the flesh for 33 years- while remaining fully God. He healed, and delivered people who barely understood who He was, and possibly came for a quick fix. He chose 12 disciples- one of whom betrayed him for 30 pieces of silver, another who denied even knowing him; all the while none stood for him in His darkest hours

Your experiences might be more painful than my most trying ones, but dare I say- none of us can give the maker a run for His money. I might be pushing through hard seasons, but what He endured- fully knowing, and fully able to change the outcome, my mind will never be able to fathom.

So what am I saying? Should we suppress our emotions and toughen up? Or remain in abusive relationships and toxic friendships? Absolutely, not. But let me jump on the classic cliches, and invite you to ask yourself: What would Jesus do- and what did He do, in spite of you?

Where would you be if He acted on how you made Him feel?

The answer lies in the latter half of the young lady’s words: “He chose to die for me”.

Let me remind you on this (hopefully beautiful) Saturday morning- or whenever you come across this blog post - there is a God who chose you, despite you. And if He can do that for you, how much more can you do that for those He has placed in your life?

You know who I’m talking about. (And by all means, pray for that abusive one and seek God’s wisdom about whether they should remain in your life.)

But that nagging cousin? That friend who pisses you off? That one person you know is tied to your journey, no matter how often you two clash? The one you are too ashamed to call back because of how things ended? That’s the one I’m inviting to hand a leaf to.